In 2005, I took a medication for bipolar disorder that
caused extreme weight gain. I was no longer my size 6 and 135 pounds. I battled
this for years and ended up taking another medication in 2009 also known for
its weight gain. By 2010, at my 40th birthday, I was a size 18 and
weighed 216 pounds. Most of my weight was in my stomach, making me look like I
had a huge beer belly or like I was very pregnant. I was asked when my baby was
due on a daily basis.
Since most of my weight was in my stomach, I put my hopes in
having liposuction to rid myself of the weight. When I consulted with two
surgeons, they both said I wasn’t a good candidate for liposuction as my weight
wasn’t on top of my muscle but behind it. I was devastated. One of the doctors
said I would have to do it the old fashioned way, through diet and exercise. However,
he said he doubted I could do it as I’m bipolar and it’s hard for people with
bipolar to stick to anything. At first, I was offended by his words yet I
wondered at their truth.
I have tried many diets over the years, hoping each one
would hold a magical spell. Seven months ago I joined a different gym, Four
Pillar Fitness in Bountiful,
Utah. It’s a small gym with
personal trainers. I began lifting weights twice a week and started seeing some
results. Then in October 2012, the gym had a weight loss challenge where every
individual won. I lost 10 pounds in addition to the 30 I had lost over the
years. A month ago, I went to Max Muscle (nationwide chain) in Bountiful, Utah
and began working with a nutrition coach. I lost another 10 pounds. Now, I’ve
lost 50 pounds from my heaviest weight.
Not due to the diets I’ve been on, but I’ve chosen to not
have a treat since before Thanksgiving. That is very atypical for me as I
usually have a small piece of chocolate every night. Success is more important
to me than food. In fact, I asked Santa to bring me no treats but a pair of
running shoes instead. I plan to lose another 15-30 pounds and take up running
or maybe even a triathlon.
I hate to admit that at my core, I’ve felt like a loser most
of my life with many of my health problems holding me back from succeeding at
my goals. I do see some truth in that doctor’s advice that a person with
bipolar has a hard time sticking to anything. I know that I go from idea to
idea. However, now that I’ve tasted a small piece of success, I can’t get
enough. I read on one of those inspirational posters, “Nothing begets success
like success.” I always wondered at its truth. I’ve found success to be
desirable and motivational to further success.
I feel like a different person inside, happier and
competent, able to face life with confidence. When I feel like caving on my
diet in the evenings, I look at a picture of myself at my heaviest, drink some
Crystal Light to curb my sweet tooth, go to bed and have sweet dreams of
weighing myself in the morning.
May you make your dreams become a reality in 2013. I know I
will. Happy New Year!!
